As is the case with every culture, dating someone from another ethnic group can be a bit trying. This is especially the case if that person happens to be from a nation that has extremely different customs than you have. When considering dating an Indian, there are certain things you should be aware of. Both men and women can benefit from understanding these cultural differences before going on that first date. Your guide to dating an Indian begins with understanding some common customs from the motherland.
A Jewish friend of mine remarked once, only half joking, that he believed Indians are the true Chosen People. With no offense to Moses, I had to agree. I lived in India for about three years and my husband currently known as my husPad, thanks to his appropriating the iPad he "gave me," - but that is another column is from New Delhi, which, in addition to providing me with lots of Indian friends and in-laws, have given me a pretty good perspective on the desirability of the people from the world's largest democracy - and how to woo them.
Before getting to "how," let's start with "why. Indians dominate as engineers, doctors, lawyers, venture capitalists and entrepreneurs.
They make up a large proportion of our graduate students - just walk around the campuses of Harvard, Columbia or Stanford or and you will see these incredibly attractive brown people all over the place. Which leads to point number two.
Indian people tend to be really good looking. Most Indians are innately gracious, social creatures; they highly value friends and family and have a calendar filled with various holidays and occasions to celebrate, which they typically do with gusto. Those endless jubilant dance numbers in Bollywood movies pretty much channel the Indian soul.
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Moreover, Indian men love to dance. If for no other reason other than you want someone to dance with you or without you for that matterdate an Indian. Ok, now that the stock for single Indians is up, you need to be on your game if you want to date one. If you are Indian, you can skip the rest of this post and spend the next four minutes savoring your desirability.
If you are not Indian, keep reading to learn seven things that should ingratiate you with them.
The first five have to do with Bollywood. Indians take Bollywood and their celebrities very seriously.
May 12, It is always difficult to date someone who comes from such a different background but almost impossible to understand someone with a culture as divergent as would be the Indian culture. This is not meant to discourage you from dating someone from India; it just serves as a guide to dating an Indian. Jul 06, Asawari Kulkarni and Anil Yardi, both aged 68, started dating last year and are now living together. Kulkarni and Yardi's romance might not seem odd in many countries, but in India late-life. Homosexuality is a 'criminal offence' under Section of the Indian Penal Code dating back to with punishments up to ten years which makes it all the more hard to believe that India is a progressive nation and that we are the 21 st century inhabitants of the country.
Two things you need to know about these initials. Two, you must have an opinion about him. He is a polarizing figure. Indians either love him or hate him. Favorite actor. If you are pinched for time, you can simply claim SRK is your favorite and move on.
But, if you want to take some initiative, I highly recommend you familiarize yourself with some Bollywood actors and choose a favorite. Kal Penn does not count. Favorite actress. See above. You need to have a favorite. You could claim that it is Aishwarya Rai, who is familiar to most Americans, although you will then be suspect as Aishwarya, while extremely beautiful and successful, is a pain in the neck.
She has a reputation for being a major diva. Better options: Rani Mukherjee or Kareena Kapoor. Favorite Hindi movie.
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It should be obvious by now that you need to have a favorite Hindi movie. If not something straight out of the Kama Sutra. One strong recommendation: "3 Idiots". It's a newish film with crossover appeal. And while seniors dating agencies are making matches, some say it's still difficult to sign people up, especially women - even when they're offered financial incentives.
This generation of elderly Indians grew up in a time when marriage was for life. Many married young to partners chosen by their parents and were expected to fulfill the duties of a traditional wife and husband - she managed the family, he earned the money.
In traditional Indian society, older people have always occupied a position of reverence.
They, in turn, are expected to lead a life that's centered around spirituality and family - often helping to care for grandchildren, for example. Dating or finding a partner in later life, after a spouse has passed away, isn't the cultural norm.
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Adult children in urban India no longer automatically invite their parents to live with them, leaving many without a support network they may have expected when they were younger. There is no shortage of older, single Indians.
According to the Census data, almost 15 million elderly Indians live alone and three-quarters of them are women. There are signs that some are interested in recoupling. InMadhav Damle, an-ex publisher in the Indian city of Pune, Maharashtra, conducted a survey of senior citizens in that city about their attitudes towards finding a companion.
Saroj Ghatani, a year-old widow from Pune, has been seeking a partner to live with for the past year.
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Her children don't like the idea, but she's prepared to go against their wishes. Now I want to think only about myself and live the life I want to," she says. Men and women typically want different things from live-in relationships, according to Natubhai Patel, He started his non-profit dating service, Anubandh Foundation, after the earthquake in Gujarat. Around 25, people were killed in the quake and many survivors were left without a spouse.
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Patel says while many older Indian women want companionship, many potential male partners are looking for someone to manage the kitchen. Natubhai Patel far right and his wife, Sheela Patel far left with a couple he introduced. Patel started his non-profit dating service, Anubandh Foundation, after the earthquake in Gujarat.
Savita Desai, 69 is happy to do that.
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She makes lunch every day for her live-in companion Hiten Parekh, 70, to take when he goes to work in Ahmedabad, Gujarat. Those aren't their real names. The couple requested to use aliases to avoid any "social embarrassment. Parekh has a wheat allergy and says, in the past eight years, Desai has taken care of him like his "own mother. Parekh and Desai initially faced opposition from his sons, who live in the same city.
Desai's children live in the US and she said life with Parekh is comfortable and easy. I don't mind taking care of him in return," she said. Some women say their days of running a household are over and believe that India needs to move on from its traditional, patriarchal system.
Jayashri M has thought about looking for a partner through organizations in her home town Bangalore, in southern India, but the year-old, who has never married, says the "expectations involved" stopped her from signing up. That's not my idea of having a companion. I don't want additional responsibility," said the former schoolteacher. Struggling with migraines?
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This specific yoga routine can help, study says. Patel and Damle agreed it's harder to attract women to their dating services. They offer discounts and other incentives, but Patel said there are still far fewer women on his books than men.